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1 of 1 copy available
1 of 1 copy available
2016 VOYA Top Shelf Fiction Selection
Anna has always been so level-headed, so easy-going, so talented and funny. How could anyone have guessed she wanted to die?
Anna is not like other people. She's always felt like she didn't belong: not with other kids, not with her family, not in her body. It isn't until her grandparents are killed in a tragic accident, however, that Anna starts to feel untethered. She begins to wonder what it would be like if she didn't exist, and the thought of escaping the aimless drifting is the only thing that brings her comfort.
When Anna overdoses on prescription painkillers, doctors realize she has been suffering from depression and start looking for a way to help her out of the desperate black hole she never thought she would escape. It's then that rock bottom comes into sight and the journey back to normal begins.
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    • Publisher's Weekly

      July 25, 2016
      Kilbourne (Dear Jo) thoughtfully addresses the topic of suicide through the story of Anna, a young artist who seems to have it all. Anna is starting classes at a new school where she can focus on her artistic talent, surrounded by those with a similar bent. She comes from a loving, well-to-do home and has friends, as well as the eye of a boy named Kyle. Yet those things take a back seat to the yawning void inside her, the insidious sensation that steals emotions and leaves her searching for a way to permanently give in to the darkness even as she tries to hide how she feels with lies and misdirection. Kilbourne draws readers deep into Anna’s thoughts and reactions, but the examination of the effects of suicide continues via the perspectives of Anna’s mother and friend, Aliya. Unfortunately, Anna’s recovery is rushed, especially in comparison to the attention given the events leading up to her suicide attempt. A too-pat ending and glossing-over of what mental illness treatment entails detracts from an otherwise sensitive and forthright discussion. Ages 14–up.

    • Publisher's Weekly

      November 30, 2009
      After a few suicide attempts, the most recent of which left her unable to speak, teenage narrator Daelyn joins a Web site called Through-the-Light, which gives her 23 days to prepare for death. Although rules state that “articipants may not attempt to dissuade or discourage self-termination,” the site does send provoking questions so she can think through her choice. Through Daelyn's rants in the site's forums and in her embittered internal narrative, readers will come to understand her struggles (from being molested in the boys' bathroom to being sent to fat camp) and see people trying to connect with her, including offbeat Santana, who is dealing with his own pain—cancer. Peters (Luna
      ) doesn't pull any punches (Through-the-Light details various suicide methods, each with an effectiveness rating, and the users' stories are painfully real). Readers may find some plotting heavy-handed (such as Daelyn's growing friendship with a boy who really wants to live), but even so, this book and its open-ended conclusion will challenge teens to think about the impact of bullying—including cyberbullying—and Through-the-Light's controversial stance that “self-termination is your right.” Ages 14–up.

    • Kirkus

      June 15, 2016
      A depressed girl contemplates suicide.Sixteen-year-old Anna has astonishing talent as an artist, but she feels apart from the world. She has friends and a loving family, all apparently white, but even when her beloved grandmother dies she cannot seem to feel anything. A standout student at an elite arts academy, Anna paints the bridge she hopes to jump from, and it becomes the centerpiece of the school's art exhibition. Despite failing at several suicide attempts, Anna remains quite determined to kill herself, although she never articulates why, even to herself, and she conceals her impulses from everyone else. At last, however, she makes one too many attempts and winds up hospitalized. There, she receives treatment that brings her back to reality, and she also learns unexpected facts about her family's past that hold clues to her condition. Kilbourne writes Anna's story in first-person chapters told by Anna, her mom, and Anna's best friend, creating suspense by juxtaposing the different viewpoints. It's a convincing and affecting narrative about depression, stressing the fact that it is not the sufferer's fault. In the end, readers get a full picture of how good treatment can restore even suicidal patients to a full life. (Readers will wish they could have learned what finally happened to Anna's bridge painting, though.) Absorbing. (Fiction. 12-18)

      COPYRIGHT(2016) Kirkus Reviews, ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.

    • School Library Journal

      June 1, 2016

      Gr 9 Up-Anna is a talented artist, has great friends and trusting parents, and goes to a wonderful art school, but she's not happy. In fact, she feels disconnected from her life, friends, and family. When her grandparents die in a tragic car crash, Anna's thoughts of suicide take over and she tries multiple times to end her own life. Finally, she manages to hoard enough prescription painkillers to overdose-a clean, easy death. That attempt is a failure, too, and Anna must begin the long climb out of depression and back to the world of the living. Told from alternating points of view, Anna's story unfolds slowly and is somewhat lopsided; most of the book is dedicated to her suicide planning, while very little time is given to her treatment and recovery. Kilbourne's storytelling is rather flat, and the plot drags through Anna's multiple suicide attempts and her mother's and friends' oblivious reactions to her cover-ups. There is a hopeful ending, but most teens won't connect with Anna or the other main characters. VERDICT An additional purchase for school and public libraries that need to beef up their selection of books about mental illness.-Ashley Fetterolf, Indian Creek Upper School, Crownsville, MD

      Copyright 2016 School Library Journal, LLC Used with permission.

    • Booklist

      August 1, 2016
      Grades 7-10 Sixteen-year-old Anna is a talented painter with a great future and supportive friends and family, but she secretly struggles with depression. Although she's had these feelings for a long time, she becomes increasingly obsessed with ending her life when her grandparents die in a car accident. Anna weaves a web of lies and makes several covert suicide attempts, but it's not until she overdoses on codeine that she is able to get help. Rotating narratives revisit scenes from different perspectives (Anna's, her mother's, and Anna's best friend Aliya's), allowing readers a greater understanding of Anna's mental illness, its warning signs, and its effects on the people around her. The realistic characters and gritty emotions are sometimes drawn with a clumsy hand in this high/low novel, but the message that depression is an illness, not a choice, resounds. In the preface, Kilbourne writes about the importance of openly discussing these topics. Use this short but detailed book in a classroom or book club setting to start a candid discussion on depression as a mental illness.(Reprinted with permission of Booklist, copyright 2016, American Library Association.)

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